The little things

1
I’m off work today and having a mosey around Cardiff-stopped for a coffee in a nice little coffee shop (coincidentally with quite attentive & attractive female staff) and it came with a heart crafted on top (as In the milk similar to a Guinness flourish) it oddly made my day after a tough time of late, and being an old fool I harbour a feint hope that I caught the eye of one of the staff?! No agenda there as a married man old enough to be their father BUT it’s nice to think grumpy guts here could inspire a heart albeit sure it was just a nice gesture…flipping eck am I having a midlife crisis?!

Re: The little things

4
Exile 1976 wrote: December 12th, 2022, 12:48 pm You sound like a creepy, dirty old man
Wow! You sound like a repressed catholic! Anyway Thanks for that smear! I hate the word “creepy” so freely applied and impossible to defend against and rather sexist as only ever applied to men. I just [genuinely] hope it’s not thrown at you. A woman my age could freely talk about getting a boost from being waited on or cheered up by a a smile from a “hunky” barista so why not a man?!

Also think my post acknowledges my silliness (note the ending it was a little tongue in cheek as much as anything) & maybe the syntax was missed but chucking the dirty old man accusation is a bit over the top eh? It was just a post about my day being made after a pretty tough time recently. No serious hope or agenda on my part, the irony being I’d always preferred older women but nowt wrong with appreciating beauty it’s part of life and everyone does it (women do it too-the horror) I won’t apologise for that.

Odd too how the accusation of dirty old man is chucked around but statistics show young women prefer older men?!

[edit] I probably took your response too seriously but double standards get my goat and it was meant to be a light hearted post but felt was trampled on - hey ho that’s Internet forums for you eh?

Re: The little things

7
This thread has made me laugh, thanks Guys*

I’m probably the same sort of age as Cathedral County and I also admit to being pleased when I receive really good customer service from a lady.

It’s not a pervy thing and in almost all cases they are just being really good at their job and nothing else, and certainly not an attempt to chat me up. It’s the 21st century so if any lady wants to chat me up it’s a free world. But it is nice to be a bloke on the receiving end of really good, attentive service and I expect lady customers feel the same when served by a fella.

* By calling you all ‘guys’, this is aimed at male, female and every forum member, and it’s just a casual phrase I use for everyone. Just in case anyone thought I was being sexist.

Re: The little things

10
CathedralCounty wrote: December 12th, 2022, 1:31 pm
Exile 1976 wrote: December 12th, 2022, 12:48 pm You sound like a creepy, dirty old man
Wow! You sound like a repressed catholic! Anyway Thanks for that smear! I hate the word “creepy” so freely applied and impossible to defend against and rather sexist as only ever applied to men. I just [genuinely] hope it’s not thrown at you. A woman my age could freely talk about getting a boost from being waited on or cheered up by a a smile from a “hunky” barista so why not a man?!

Also think my post acknowledges my silliness (note the ending it was a little tongue in cheek as much as anything) & maybe the syntax was missed but chucking the dirty old man accusation is a bit over the top eh? It was just a post about my day being made after a pretty tough time recently. No serious hope or agenda on my part, the irony being I’d always preferred older women but nowt wrong with appreciating beauty it’s part of life and everyone does it (women do it too-the horror) I won’t apologise for that.

Odd too how the accusation of dirty old man is chucked around but statistics show young women prefer older men?!

[edit] I probably took your response too seriously but double standards get my goat and it was meant to be a light hearted post but felt was trampled on - hey ho that’s Internet forums for you eh?

A repressed catholic huh? Haha, no, not quite.

To be honest with you, your reply sounds even creepier with you banging on about it not being fair that women can do it …and that statistics show women prefer older men, etc.

And cool your jets muc, I didn’t say you ARE a dirty old man, just that the post made you sound like a dirty old man….I’m sure you’re not, so don’t worry.

Re: The little things

12
Exile 1976 wrote: December 12th, 2022, 6:12 pm
CathedralCounty wrote: December 12th, 2022, 1:31 pm
Exile 1976 wrote: December 12th, 2022, 12:48 pm You sound like a creepy, dirty old man
Wow! You sound like a repressed catholic! Anyway Thanks for that smear! I hate the word “creepy” so freely applied and impossible to defend against and rather sexist as only ever applied to men. I just [genuinely] hope it’s not thrown at you. A woman my age could freely talk about getting a boost from being waited on or cheered up by a a smile from a “hunky” barista so why not a man?!

Also think my post acknowledges my silliness (note the ending it was a little tongue in cheek as much as anything) & maybe the syntax was missed but chucking the dirty old man accusation is a bit over the top eh? It was just a post about my day being made after a pretty tough time recently. No serious hope or agenda on my part, the irony being I’d always preferred older women but nowt wrong with appreciating beauty it’s part of life and everyone does it (women do it too-the horror) I won’t apologise for that.

Odd too how the accusation of dirty old man is chucked around but statistics show young women prefer older men?!

[edit] I probably took your response too seriously but double standards get my goat and it was meant to be a light hearted post but felt was trampled on - hey ho that’s Internet forums for you eh?

A repressed catholic huh? Haha, no, not quite.

To be honest with you, your reply sounds even creepier with you banging on about it not being fair that women can do it …and that statistics show women prefer older men, etc.

And cool your jets muc, I didn’t say you ARE a dirty old man, just that the post made you sound like a dirty old man….I’m sure you’re not, so don’t worry.
I shouldn’t have gone all sectarian on you there…

Like I said think I took your reply a little too seriously (as you did my post perhaps?) and get you weren’t necessarily having a pop at me as such.

That said you again use “creepy/ier” just because I pointed out a massive double standard and some facts-I admit I get on my high horse when it comes to matters men as 1) I am one 2) despite constant and misleading narratives men suffer as many double standards and issues as women do maybe it all balances out but it surely it IS unfair and if a bloke of *say* 50 (not me as I’m not quite that old yet and all my long term relationships have been with older women) can be be branded a dirty old man for *consensually* having a string of younger partners (my point on the statistics was that many younger women prefer or gravitate towards older men which suggests no exploitation rather grown ups going into things with eyes wide open) while an older woman is lauded and given whoops of encouragement for doing so (you go girl!, etc) and worse other men have been conditioned to smear other men.m around that.

I’ve veered off my original point but it just sticks in my craw that men don’t have the same freedoms women have - it’s 2022 not 1952! Gender equality should mean just that, and while it’s not my bag a man wanting and having a relationship with someone 10-15 years heck even 20 years younger than them (providing it’s all legal of course) is fine by me nothing “creepy” about it!

Re: The little things

13
CathedralCounty wrote: December 12th, 2022, 8:04 pm
Exile 1976 wrote: December 12th, 2022, 6:12 pm
CathedralCounty wrote: December 12th, 2022, 1:31 pm
Exile 1976 wrote: December 12th, 2022, 12:48 pm You sound like a creepy, dirty old man
Wow! You sound like a repressed catholic! Anyway Thanks for that smear! I hate the word “creepy” so freely applied and impossible to defend against and rather sexist as only ever applied to men. I just [genuinely] hope it’s not thrown at you. A woman my age could freely talk about getting a boost from being waited on or cheered up by a a smile from a “hunky” barista so why not a man?!

Also think my post acknowledges my silliness (note the ending it was a little tongue in cheek as much as anything) & maybe the syntax was missed but chucking the dirty old man accusation is a bit over the top eh? It was just a post about my day being made after a pretty tough time recently. No serious hope or agenda on my part, the irony being I’d always preferred older women but nowt wrong with appreciating beauty it’s part of life and everyone does it (women do it too-the horror) I won’t apologise for that.

Odd too how the accusation of dirty old man is chucked around but statistics show young women prefer older men?!

[edit] I probably took your response too seriously but double standards get my goat and it was meant to be a light hearted post but felt was trampled on - hey ho that’s Internet forums for you eh?

A repressed catholic huh? Haha, no, not quite.

To be honest with you, your reply sounds even creepier with you banging on about it not being fair that women can do it …and that statistics show women prefer older men, etc.

And cool your jets muc, I didn’t say you ARE a dirty old man, just that the post made you sound like a dirty old man….I’m sure you’re not, so don’t worry.
I shouldn’t have gone all sectarian on you there…

Like I said think I took your reply a little too seriously (as you did my post perhaps?) and get you weren’t necessarily having a pop at me as such.

That said you again use “creepy/ier” just because I pointed out a massive double standard and some facts-I admit I get on my high horse when it comes to matters men as 1) I am one 2) despite constant and misleading narratives men suffer as many double standards and issues as women do maybe it all balances out but it surely it IS unfair and if a bloke of *say* 50 (not me as I’m not quite that old yet and all my long term relationships have been with older women) can be be branded a dirty old man for *consensually* having a string of younger partners (my point on the statistics was that many younger women prefer or gravitate towards older men which suggests no exploitation rather grown ups going into things with eyes wide open) while an older woman is lauded and given whoops of encouragement for doing so (you go girl!, etc) and worse other men have been conditioned to smear other men.m around that.

I’ve veered off my original point but it just sticks in my craw that men don’t have the same freedoms women have - it’s 2022 not 1952! Gender equality should mean just that, and while it’s not my bag a man wanting and having a relationship with someone 10-15 years heck even 20 years younger than them (providing it’s all legal of course) is fine by me nothing “creepy” about it!
And of course the double standard do not apply if the man is rich and / or famous. He can be 20, 30 or even 40 years older than his female partner and it's socially acceptable. Mick Jagger for example is 43 years older than his girlfriend.

Re: The little things

14
Blackandamber wrote: December 14th, 2022, 8:35 pm
CathedralCounty wrote: December 12th, 2022, 8:04 pm
Exile 1976 wrote: December 12th, 2022, 6:12 pm
CathedralCounty wrote: December 12th, 2022, 1:31 pm
Exile 1976 wrote: December 12th, 2022, 12:48 pm You sound like a creepy, dirty old man
Wow! You sound like a repressed catholic! Anyway Thanks for that smear! I hate the word “creepy” so freely applied and impossible to defend against and rather sexist as only ever applied to men. I just [genuinely] hope it’s not thrown at you. A woman my age could freely talk about getting a boost from being waited on or cheered up by a a smile from a “hunky” barista so why not a man?!

Also think my post acknowledges my silliness (note the ending it was a little tongue in cheek as much as anything) & maybe the syntax was missed but chucking the dirty old man accusation is a bit over the top eh? It was just a post about my day being made after a pretty tough time recently. No serious hope or agenda on my part, the irony being I’d always preferred older women but nowt wrong with appreciating beauty it’s part of life and everyone does it (women do it too-the horror) I won’t apologise for that.

Odd too how the accusation of dirty old man is chucked around but statistics show young women prefer older men?!

[edit] I probably took your response too seriously but double standards get my goat and it was meant to be a light hearted post but felt was trampled on - hey ho that’s Internet forums for you eh?

A repressed catholic huh? Haha, no, not quite.

To be honest with you, your reply sounds even creepier with you banging on about it not being fair that women can do it …and that statistics show women prefer older men, etc.

And cool your jets muc, I didn’t say you ARE a dirty old man, just that the post made you sound like a dirty old man….I’m sure you’re not, so don’t worry.
I shouldn’t have gone all sectarian on you there…

Like I said think I took your reply a little too seriously (as you did my post perhaps?) and get you weren’t necessarily having a pop at me as such.

That said you again use “creepy/ier” just because I pointed out a massive double standard and some facts-I admit I get on my high horse when it comes to matters men as 1) I am one 2) despite constant and misleading narratives men suffer as many double standards and issues as women do maybe it all balances out but it surely it IS unfair and if a bloke of *say* 50 (not me as I’m not quite that old yet and all my long term relationships have been with older women) can be be branded a dirty old man for *consensually* having a string of younger partners (my point on the statistics was that many younger women prefer or gravitate towards older men which suggests no exploitation rather grown ups going into things with eyes wide open) while an older woman is lauded and given whoops of encouragement for doing so (you go girl!, etc) and worse other men have been conditioned to smear other men.m around that.

I’ve veered off my original point but it just sticks in my craw that men don’t have the same freedoms women have - it’s 2022 not 1952! Gender equality should mean just that, and while it’s not my bag a man wanting and having a relationship with someone 10-15 years heck even 20 years younger than them (providing it’s all legal of course) is fine by me nothing “creepy” about it!
And of course the double standard do not apply if the man is rich and / or famous. He can be 20, 30 or even 40 years older than his female partner and it's socially acceptable. Mick Jagger for example is 43 years older than his girlfriend.
Good point albeit I do think people comment on it probably because Jagger (who can't sign and is smug and annoying) is a 'celebrity' - as it happen my wife is older than me and that's also been commented on as well, my dad nearly spat out his coffee at the time when I told him the age gap which isn't that big - tbqh provided its all legal and not coercive then an age difference either way is and should be fine.

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